my midlife crisis

okay, so first thing you should know about my 18 (nearly 19 - eeeeeeeep) year old self is that I'm very dramatic where it comes to my age. I think the night before I turned 15 or 16 I was nearly in tears because I was getting "so old". I have no idea why I have this obsession with being young but I just do and currently I am going through a midlife crisis.

I always imagined that growing up was going to be a very glamorous journey thanks to the lovely misconception American TV shows bring. High School was going to be filled with the most amazing clothes, outrageous parties, cute boys and make-up to die for. Somehow when I reached that stage in life I just was not as superficial as the “typical American teen” – I’m putting that in quotation marks because I think it’s a very fake version of what teenage girls are like in America or anywhere in the world and seeing as over the last week most of my viewers were from the USA I don’t want to offend anyone. I’m not going to say that I didn’t love clothes – because I still do and my friends and I spent faaaar too much time discussing boys but that’s not all that we were. I wanted to accomplish so much not only in high school but while I am young. I wanted to change the world. Be known as the girl who moves mountains and creates a change not only in her community but her country at large.

And when it came time to choose varsities or career paths I was so confused that I ended up applying to only one university with such different application courses that it’s a miracle I was chosen and accepted. But now I realize I’m studying a course of basically 8 years. That means that by the time I’m done studying I’m 24 and then working another 2 years as a requirement to my degree. I’ll be 26 before I can do anything of value to this world.

This is the type of mindset I’ve ALWAYS had – constantly putting limitations to what I’m able to achieve. “I’ll do my first lookpost once I’ve gone shopping and got a really amazing outfit" or "I’ll do my DIY post but I first need a better camera.” Somehow everything I wanted to do in life – not only on my blog but in personal goals and dreams I’ve had for myself - had a constraint to it that prevented it from happening.

I’m not sure exactly what this post is leading to but I know that if I want to be successful at anything in life or make an accomplishment that makes me happy I have to put in the effort and break through the barriers that my constraints have created. I’ve made a list for myself of things I would like to accomplish by the end of the year and with just less than 5 months of the year left I think it’s more than enough time.

What would you like to achieve this year still and how are you going to fight the limitations that we all so easily put on ourselves. Remember that it’s all about being a better you and how you’re able to aid society because at the end of the day your happiness is important but a story or journey is so much more special when it transcends to someone else.

How are you going to make the last few months of 2013 memorable?

seventeen magazine

Ok, so firstly I apologise for not blogging in forever. I wasn't hectically busy just feeling super lazy and enjoying my holiday.

So most of you know that this holiday I was given the amazing opportunity of interning at Seventeen Magazine and I'm not gonna lie - it was quite cool. I think naturally I just had these super high expectations that no one could ever meet but still I think my experience was worth it.

I was lucky enough to intern Janine Jellars (the editor of Seventeen) and as a bonus I got an extra week of interning compared to the other interns. I met so many amazing girls who I truly consider to be friends now and could not imagine spending my 2 weeks with any other girls.
I think in my head I imagined that it was going to be a total Devil Wears Prada think mixed in with some really young, girly and amazing experiences.

It's really hard trying to explain my experience. I think that like with any experience there was certain things I enjoyed and others I did not.

Things I loved
- my opinion counted. they genuinely cared about what we had to say and took us serious as readers
- the girls I interned with - total beauties
- the kind and friendly faces of the Seventeen Team
- getting to do a photoshoot - not sure if I loved it but I did enjoy it (afterwards)
- doing streetstyle
- going sourcing for outfits
- lunch breaks
- getting to write something which will go into the magazine
- and so much more

Things I didn't enjoy
- the fact that I did not get to be with the person I was interning for the majority of the time. This was simply because they have tiny offices so it would be extremely impractical
- sitting in a separate room with the other interns. I loved the girls but often we felt very excluded
- the limited amount of work we were given

Things I learnt
- Ask as many questions as possible
- if you don't ask for more you won't be given it - this took me a while to realise.I am quite nervous when it comes to people of authority and who I admire so I often find myself in a situation where I am scared to speak up and instead find myself sitting with regret afterwards
- Speak up and be confident
- when meeting new people the best thing is to smile, be friendly and ask lots of questions. The quicker you find similar interests (i.e Baked the Blog) the sooner you'll find yourself with too little time and too much to talk about

There was a point where in all honesty I thought I wasn't enjoying it as much as I thought I would but then the other day on twitter I saw someone bad mouth the magazine - and I took it personally. The thing is I actually love this magazine more than I did before. I know the thorough editing process it goes through and the brainstorming of ideas. I know how critically they look at the magazine and how they aim to create the best possible magazine with what they have. And when I think back none of my stupid complaints really mean anything because as I write this post I am only thinking about the amazing times I had on my 2 week journey as part of the Seventeen Intern Academy

A special thanks to Aadilah, Kelly N, Kelly (Justin Bieber), Christina, Andrea, Meagan, Zenande, Zee, Nicole A, Naledi, Amber, Bianca, Megan, Robyn, Angelique and Nicole VB

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Interns from week 1

Janine Jellars (the editor) and I

Interns from week 2

Our cool gift bags

holiday catch-up

This holiday has pretty much turned out to be like most holidays. I find myself making endless lists of everything I plan on doing and somehow find myself watching the days go by with nothing to show for it - well I guess this time it's due to my internship at seventeen which deserves an entire blog post dedicated to it which will definitely appear next week :D.

I had so many goals for this holiday including look posts, a town day with Roxy from the Transform8ion Stat8ion and so much more. Although it's time I get a bit more realistic with my endless list of plans I rediscovered a passion of mine which deserves a mention.

Reading.

I just love it. New or old books and the stories they hold. I've always loved reading and I remember in grade 4 how our teacher gave us a list which we had to fill with the names of the books we read. We were so competitive and often our lists had about 8 - 10 books each week just so that we could be the "winner" and also because a passion had begun to brew within our souls.

I'm not sure if any of you have read the Sweet Valley books but I absolutely loved them ! I reached a point where I had read everyone of the books from 3 or 4 different libraries and from every second hand book store I could find. After I thought I would never find the missing books to this endless series, when I got to high school I made friends with a girl named Miriam who had the same obsession with these books and we'd swap books with one another that we ourselves had not read in turn borrowing a book to the other.

It's crazy how our passions just seem to fall into a slump when we no longer feed it but somewhere through out high school I just stopped reading. Yes, I read the Harry Potter and Twilight series but I just did not have that same craving for a good book. Until recently.

These are the 3 books I am currently reading (yes - all 3 at the same time) and I can say I definitely love each and every one of them.

1. The Honest Life - Jessica Alba

 I can't say that I wasn't slightly influenced to get this book because Jessica Alba wrote it but once I started reading it I really began to love it. It's almost a "self-help"-ish book that really focuses on how oblivious we are to harm and toxicity of everyday products we use and how easily we are fooled by what companies tell us instead of knowing the truth. I especially love the up-close-and-personal images of this perfect family and her easy style of writing. I got this book off Kalahari.com and received it about 2 weeks early than the suggested date which was amazing






2. Lies Young Women Believe - Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Dannah Cresh

I'm really embarrassed to say that I received this books for my 18th birthday last year from my friends Robin and Roxy. I can however say that it's a must read for any young (or old) Christian woman. It teaches us about how easily we fall for lies and how these lies consume us. I also loves how it takes so many of these lies and breaks it down using Bible verses leaving you knowing that there definitely is a God watching down over you. I definitely recommend this book as a gift for any girl in your life and can promise that they will be inspired and empowered by it.







3. Committed - Elizabeth Gilbert

Although I've barely started with this book (I am only on page 13 now) I know that if it's anything like "Eat Pray Love" I am going to love it. I found this book in our study nestled among my mommy's collection of books and knew that I had to give it a read. It satisfies the part of my soul that loves a good story and seeing as I am quite soppy and romantic I think it's going to be a great read








I'll be spending the rest of my week finishing my internship and my article (YES - I actually get a 3 page article published in Seventeen magazine so keep your eyes peeled for the October issue) and I am also thinking of starting some DIY's because I absolutely love them!

feel free to leave any comments and names of blogs you think I should check out and follow me on Bloglovin by clicking the little (or HUGE) icon on the side that looks like an Eiffel Tower

and best news of the year: I got my license on saturday :D !

new blog find : Christ Alive in Me

x

holidays

These holidays have come as such a relief. Not because I could not wait for later nights and late mornings or the fact that I have no class, no studying and no worrying. I love holidays because its the perfect time to have loads and loads and loads of "me" time - something that everyone needs once in a while.

I'm HUGE on self improvement. Give me any book with the 10 steps to be a better me, a book to help me learn a new skill or something cool to try out - they're all right up my alley and this is exactly what I'm spending my amazing 6 week holiday doing. I've decided to start gymming again and after not being here for a few months straight I found myself dissapointed with what I've allowed to happen. I've never been super skinny or even really fit but I've always strived to look after my health and this is now more evident. Trying to "clean up" my usual diet of sweets and chocolates or chocolates and sweets into something more healthy is definitely on my "to-do" list for this holiday.

I've planted my own veggie garden to aid my new healthy lifestyle and I'll post pictures as soon as I can actually decipher what is what (maybe I should've put up cute little boards with each of their names on?). Today I repacked my entire room and colour co-ordinated all of my clothes - I'm OCD like that. I neatly filed away all of last semesters work ready for the up and coming semester. I love being organised and I love organising and cleaning as strange as that sounds. When my life gets stressed and flustered you can see it in my room and after the previous exams my room looked like hell.

I'm planning on starting my internship at Seventeen Magazine next week - How amazing is that, I still can't believe I was chosen. And hopefully I'll be getting my license in the near future or going by my track record at least by the end of the year.

The thing is so many people see the holidays as a time to do absolutely nothing but what are your days if you did nothing in them? Rather take this time and do something for yourself. Sit down and put your pen to some paper to decide what you want and how you going to get it because if anyone is going to make you successful at any task at hand it's going to be you.

Remember you determine your own future. 

So for everyone on holiday : enjoy it! whether you choose to absolutely nothing or absolutely everything and for those who aren't remember to take at least 10 minutes a day to just have some time to yourself. Read your Bible, read a book, take a relaxing bath, go to gym, make yourself your favourite meal or what ever makes you happy! Remember to always prioritise yourself

must read blog of the week : Transform8ion St8ion

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16 June 1976 | 16 June 2013

Writing this blog post is frustrating. I know exactly what I want to say but trying to convert these hyperactive feelings into something understandable is harder than I thought it would be.

So I assume all South African’s know that even though yesterday was technically Youth day we find ourselves celebrating it today with Father’s day somewhat taking preference yesterday. To those who don’t know what Youth day is, it is basically the celebration and commemoration of the hundreds and thousands of non-white students who marched to Orlando Stadium in Soweto to protest against unfair education policies being implemented targeting non-white students doing Apartheid. These students were targeted by the police and shot, killed and injured but this was a risk they were willing to face.

Imagine. Imagine not only the atmosphere of excitement and passion of those students as they marched down those streets. But imagine the fear that today could very well be their last. Knowing that when they said bye to their parents that morning it could be the last time they ever saw them and this act of marching could be the very last thing they ever did. Could you even try and comprehend the mind-set those students had as they faced their greatest fears? But their passion, dignity and conviction is what gave them the drive to carry on despite their inevitable fears.

Recently my friend Dain Sisam has been tweeting thought provoking tweets to say the least and when he and his friends began their “Conformists” movement I could not help but be inspired, motivated and somewhat embarrassed. As the youth we’ve taken the backseat to any and everything happening in our country and after our tediously enormous amount of whining, complaining and blaming each and every one of our problems on the government we do absolutely nothing about it. I actually feel like laughing at how pathetic it sounds but then I realise that I am part of this generation and guess what? This generalisation of what the youth is complies to me as well. Because one day when people look back on what our generation did or did not accomplish they won’t refer to it as the generation excluding Zina. No, my name will be lost in the sea of thousands who all fall under the title of “their generation”.

It is time for us as youth to make the sacrifices required for the changes that we feel the need to be made. No longer should we be the youth that complains and waits for something to happen but instead we should be voices of reason. A strong and steadfast generation who knows exactly what we want and who are willing to stand up for what we deserve. We should be protesting for education and change but at the same time we need to realise the consequences of what we are asking for. If we going to ask for an equal education it is expected that we fill up those classrooms and put an effort into learning. If we going to ask to ask for change it is up to us to embrace the change.

Being part of the youth of South Africa is a privilege. We are granted the opportunity to mould South Africa into the land that we want as leaders of this country. It’s time for us to take a stand and demand that we be respected and that our voices are heard across this country. We need to unite and as a generation we need to be so much more. 

Because NOW, is the time for us

* Dain's blog : Dain You and Me

This photo was found on twitter. Uploaded by Equal Education it shows as students marched across the Nelson Mandela bridge to celebrate youth day

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getting winter ready

so while I should be studying for my exams that starts next week I couldn't help myself from doing a post on getting yourself ready for these cold winter months ahead with one of my favourite brands and a new find which is sure to creep into my wardrobe this winter.

Obviously Woolworths would be on my list. I think that they are synonomys with high quality everything and their sleepwear department is definitely my fave. I remember from a young age my mom would always get our sleepwear and things from woolies simply because you knew it would last aswell as it was so pretty. I recently got a new gown there and I am in love with it. I sleep in it everynight and it does more than its job from protecting me from the cold winter nights that are creeping in. Here's a few of my favourite pieces from their website:

All of these items can be found on the woolies website under the label sleepwear and lounge wear. follow the link to go directly to it : woolworths sleepwear and loungewear

The second brand on my blog today will be Sheinside . They are an American based online clothing company with the most gorgeous clothes I've seen in a long time and all of their clothes are up to date with the latest trends and the best part is is that they have free world wide shipping :D. My friend Layla from The ethereal deal told me about this gem. I found these 6 knits that I think are perfect for the chilly winter months and I can't wait to place my order and own some of these pretty pieces:

these pretty goodies range from R250 - R370 which is such a reasonable price for a warm sweater to embrace you through the winter months. These are from my wishlist but form you own and get cracking : Sheinside sweaters

I hope you enjoyed this post as much as I did while putting it together. Remember to leave comments about your opinions of the blog and what you'd like to read more about. For updates on the blog be sure to follow me on the following :

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zina x

students as agents of social change

Have you ever experienced that feeling, that overwhelming feeling of passion and the need o do something, to change something and to be something so much bigger than what you are? I can personally say this is something I feel so often. But for some or other reason we don’t act on this passion and slowly it starts to simmer down and after days, weeks and even months of not acting on this feeling you are left with nothing but a mere memory of what of would’ve , could’ve and should’ve instead of what you did.

This blog post is dedicated to this feeling and why I had this feeling last night. In the beginning of the year every student in Stellenbosch University received an email that encouraged us to apply for a course with the Frederick Van Zyl Slabbert Institute called “Students as Agents of Social Change”. In all honesty I think that most students skimmed the email or did not even take the time to figure out what it was about but because this is where my passion lies and what I love I applied and fortunately was one of 25/26 students chosen to take part in his short course.

Last night was our 4^th session and we had an amazing opportunity to meet students from the University of Georgia. We spent the afternoon eating and socialising, getting to know one another and in truth it was the first time I had actually spoken to and gotten to know so many of my fellow “agents”. In the week each agent had to send in a photo that we identified as a problem in today’s society and then speak for 2-3 (inevitably much longer for most) about why it is a problem and what role students play in trying to fix the problem.

We discussed various topics from sustainability, education, land, politics till even imagination. We sat in a room so pumped up, our blood boiling with eagerness to say or do something. To have our opinions’ heard and to go out and change the world. But as one student from Georgia pointed out, and it’s something that is pointed out in every one of our sessions, it’s great that we are able to discuss this and to be so passionate about it but if we don’t act on this passion it says in the room we are in. All it then becomes is a weekly 2.5 hours of passion that disappears into nothing after days, weeks and inevitably months of not acting on our passions.  

Whenever I had this feeling of passion, I’d have these huge dreams of what I would accomplish but slowly but surely I would convince myself that I am far too small in this world to create this change that I dream of. But my first step is that I no longer want that passion that I feel to be limited in a room which I why I am sharing it

with each and every one of you reading this post.

I want to encourage you to start speaking about what you are passionate about, even if you are speaking to your friends about it. And don’t think that your passions are in any way inferior to someone else’s. Whether your passion is fashion, music, dancing, politics, economics or any other topic you can think of, your ideas are in no way limited or inferior and ultimately it is up to you to make you passions so much more than a passion that may one day just die down.

I hope you find in yourself the passion and strength to want, create and be so much more than even you think you are capable of

“The world is not interested in what we do for a living. What they are interested in is what we have to offer freely - hope, strength, love and the power to make a difference!” - Sasha Azevedo

a photo from our session last night - found on Lloyd's twitter account :)

A special thanks to the Frederick Van Zyl Slabbert Institute for Student Leadership, Lloyd Blake, (uncle) Llewlyn MacMaster, my fellow agents and the students from the University of Georgia for an amazingly inspiring and eye-opener of a night

be sure to check out what other courses are running if inerested and apply to as many as you like!

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